Scrotum Rugs and Song of the Day (3/5/2019)

Today’s song of the day is a lovely little ditty that’ll get your toe-a-tappin’.  It’s $50 And A Flask Of Crown by Bleu Edmondson.  Odds are extremely high that you haven’t heard this song, but it’s a great one.  It reminds me of the opening theme song of Hey Dude.  This blog is so fucking epic.

I’ll keep this next point nice and short – merely a wrinkle in time.  Remember being a kid at camp, hanging with the guys, telling stories over a campfire, and shining the Maglite through your scrotum?  Remember having that initial dalliance with your bag as you navigated all the veins and hair follicles?  Well now you can share a generic batwing with the rest of the world via your living room floor!  Enter the Safavieh Porcello Collection PRL7737F Light Grey and Orange Area Rug available on Amazon:

A1uYqEVmQEL._SL1500_

Candidly, I’m a bit of a sad sack as these aren’t currently customizable.  Bezos spends so much time nurturing and photographing his own fruit basket that he hasn’t stopped to think about his customers’ sacks.  Perhaps your dear Disillusioned Dilettante can work with Amazon to patent a flash camera technology so you can ultimately display your own, personalized map on your living room floor.  How receptive will Whole Foods be to in-store photo booths?  We’ll place it in produce, near the other fruit baskets.

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