My relationship to the Bachelor has been pretty incredible. After shittalking a roommate for watching it, I became a devoted fan within three episodes. By the time the next season came around, I wrote the first contestant breakdown review. That was four years ago. The last three seasons, I have watched the first two episodes... Continue Reading →
Song of the Day (12/12/2018)
Quick post today because I'm outside and freezing my baguettes off. Today's song of the day is Peace by OAR. Now an amusing product from amazon: And something for Arch Stanton, whose high score at the Walmart Big Buck Hunter will never compare to mine. Check out this buck: How do you like them apples,... Continue Reading →
Arch Stanton Guest Post: Episode 25 of Today I Learned – Gaston Means
No time to waste today - here is the first three sentences of Gaston Means' Wikipedia page: "Gaston Bullock Means (July 11, 1879 – December 12, 1938) was an American private detective, salesman, bootlegger, forger, swindler, murder suspect, blackmailer, and con artist. While not involved in the Teapot Dome scandal, Means was associated with other... Continue Reading →
The Shadow Guest Post: Bill Shakespeare Meets Rihanna
"Thou, nature, art my goddess; to thy law My services are bound. Wherefore should I Stand in the plague of custom, and permit The curiosity of nations to deprive me, For that I am some twelve or fourteen moonshines Lag of a brother? Why bastard? wherefore base? … Legitimate Edgar, I must have your land.... Continue Reading →
Arch Stanton Guest Post: Spite Houses
You've heard stories about neighbors who have worn on each others' nerves about whatever it is homeowners get mad at each other about - I'll never know because I'm a Millennial and I'll be renting forever! - and eventually resort to planting or cutting down trees just to be an asshole to their neighbor. That's... Continue Reading →
Happy Hanukkah
Wishing everyone a happy and safe Hanukkah. Pornhub wishes you the same happy wishes: Separately, I was in a washroom the other day where there was a sign stating "Clean Hands are Safe Hands." I'm wondering if the White House's female staffers would do well to put down their presidential pepper spray and opt for... Continue Reading →
House of the Day (12/5/2018)
Okay, so I actually have four houses of the day but each is worthy of your time. Before I begin, I NEED this readership to know that there is a real-life "Cowboys & Indians" magazine currently in circulation. As many of you know, I am the legitimate love-child of John Wayne and Ronald Reagan, so... Continue Reading →
Arch Stanton Guest Post: Perfect Songs, Part 1
When I was in eighth grade or so, burning CDs was the coolest shit on the planet. I burned SO MANY CDs, many of which I still had until I tossed them in the garbage as this form of music is roughly four iterations of music outdated by now. It was about this time I... Continue Reading →
Article: The Curse of the Honeycrisp Apple
Here's an article on The Curse of the Honeycrisp Apple: Everyone’s favorite apple is leaving Northeastern orchards out on a limb. (DD interjection: FUCK New England and their self-serving, phony baloney altruism - they're FAKE NEWS! Constantly pettifogging about when it comes to which university someone attended / someone's daddy bought. As if! Am I... Continue Reading →
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