...he had a rape charge reduced to tailgating. "How fat is she?" When she gets out of the water, she leaves a ring around the lake. - Rodney Dangerfield
Rent Is Too Damn High!
Who here remembers the Rent Is Too Damn High Party of yesteryear? According to Wikipedia, the Rent Is Too Damn High Party is a political party, primarily active in the state of New York, that has nominated candidates for mayor of New York City in 2005 and 2009, and for governor and senator in 2010.... Continue Reading →
#MeToo Memorial Day Edition
This doesn't have anything to do with Memorial Day but I discovered a gross injustice on this special day. I challenge all of you to go home and ask your Alexa "what's the average penis size" and she'll be more than happy to provide an informed, detailed answer. Then, ask Alexa "how deep is the... Continue Reading →
Nicolas Cage Pillow Cases
It's been said that I sometimes waste "company time" while I'm at the office. Well let's prove them wrong, shall we? So I spent the last 15-20 minutes pulling together the following:
Song of the Day (4/29/2019)
Epic, epic pick-me-up song today. Not sure if this is EDM or what but I have it on good authority that this song is amazing when you're f*cked up. It's Indian Summer by Jai Wolf. Now for some random photos from the last few days:
Random Bidtits (4/25/2019)
I write to you today from the increasingly familiar confines of my workplace shitchair. I've been wrestling this snake to the ground for a long time now and I'm hearing people return for the morning's second round, effectively lapping your strained author. No matter as I'm preocupado, furiously clenching my door frame, crushing peas into... Continue Reading →
Random Bidtits (4/16/2019)
How pissed would you be if you were Polish and you found out that the U.S. military is building a base in your country named Fort Trump? How pissed would you be if you were Donald Trump and you found out your namesake military installation is in Poland? This beer is on fleek:
Pro Tip on Calendaring
When on work computers and setting up meeting invites, sometimes you need to figure out the number of days between today and a future date. Always double check your spelling before searching on google, lest you search "gays to date" on your work computer. The I.T. team learned a lot about me today. Now here's... Continue Reading →
Random Bidtits (4/8/2019)
Just a collection of random items: There's a guy on Xbox Live whose gamer name is JuulWithJesus. There's a dating app made specifically for stoners called High There! At the local vet, there's a puppy up for adoption named Angus. Let's hope he isn't adopted by the same Korean family that adopted Kobe. Two dogs... Continue Reading →
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