OMG! Asians are Disadvantaged at Harvard?!?

Stop the presses. SHUT DOWN THE MACHIIIIIIINES!!!!

What the fuck just happened and how is this now news? Fortunately, your author and Individual Liberties Justice Warrior is here to clear the air. Let me explain something very fucking clearly for you SJWs. Put down your pastel-colored knitted scarves and shake off your fair trade hemp sandals because this is going to be jarring:

AFFIRMATIVE ACTION IN THE WORKPLACE AND ON CAMPUS IS EFFECTIVELY A ZERO SUM GAME. Wooooooooooo-aahhh! Shocking, right? All these Asians and SJWs are now up in arms about this news from the DOJ. I ask you: WHAT ABOUT AFFIRMATIVE ACTION?!? For years, decades, scores, Harvard, Goldman Sachs, and every other institution of any merit has disadvantaged white people for the benefit of non-white people. SHOCKING! But now that non-whites are being institutionally disadvantaged, well, it’s time to throw a massive shit fit and “take it to the streets.”

Jesus, guys. I don’t really care if you support affirmative action or not. But these SJWs warriors can’t pick winner and losers out of some self-ascribed moral high ground. The hypocrisy is disgusting. Amazing that people aren’t making the parallel between this DOJ story and affirmative action.

Sorry to bum you guys out. Here’s some jingoism that’ll put the tingle back in your jones:

‘Merica, motherfuckers. Sorry for the rant. I feel this immense urge to break my dick on the backs of these hypocrites. (SPOILER ALERT: your author is male)

What can I say? As the world’s first ILJW, I believe in rugged individualism. That’s why I voted for Faith Spotted Eagle. I really identified with her foreign policy platform and bold economic plan.

Let’s put the merit back in meritocracy, folks.