F SJWs, I’m an ILJW

HEAR YE, HEAR YE.  My body and mind grow weak with the boatload of politically correct rainbows and unicorns shit to which we’ve been subjected for too long.  Today, I announce that I’ll be the first rat down the anchor line.  To quote Rooster Cogburn, “I bow out.”  I guess there’s nothing left to do but claim my own faction within the Tea Partay.  Here and now, I’m coining the phrase: Individual Liberty Justice Warrior.  Write that down.  I’m here to halt the phony baloney nonsense, pack it up, and ship that shit back to Berkeley where it belongs, oozing it’s unproductive juices into the bay.  OH!  Speaking of the gay bay, big news in Tim Cook’s Apple:

First things first, you just know that Tim Cook heard “bull” and is already planning on how he and his team can get caught with their pants down around their legs on this partnership.  Second things second, you just know that once Tim Cook gets his hands on Tesla, the market for novelty penis stick shifts is going to take off.  Speaking of which, how ballin is this:

If Mr. Cook were to identify with one particular variety of Apple, which would it be?  I’m guessing there would be a special place in his heart for Spartan apples but what about Bloody Ploughman apples?  Or Cockpit Improved apples?  He definitely wouldn’t go for the Pink Sparkle apples.  Maybe the Pixie Crunch variety?  Or the Queen Cox apple or Bundy’s Ringwood apple.  Or the Lord Hindlip.  He’s gay.  You get it.

I should probably bounce but wanted to share some neat resources with my reader.  This website (https://www.thebalance.com/what-is-the-fed-dot-plot-416891) has some great stuff for people dipping their toes in finance.  The background on the Fed dot plot is helpful but there are other articles that are similarly interesting and educational.

Thinking of investing in TSLA or buying one of their sweet rides?  Check out this article titled “Wall Street analysts tore down a Tesla Model 3 and found ‘significant fit & finish issues’ (TSLA)” from Business Insider first.  That shit is a little disconcerting.

I’m getting lazy.  This post was originally intended to be about something else entirely but I thought-masturbated the ILJW concept into existence this evening and had to share it with the world.  Stay hungry, hombres.