Global. Administrative. Assistant.

Let that sink in for a moment. Global. Administrative. Assistant. Say it a few times, first in your head and then out loud. Roll it around on your tongue for a minute. How does that make you feel? Sort of queasy?

BOOM! I have the PERFECT solution for runaway higher education costs in this country: title inflation! Why load up on student debt and spend four years of your life drudging through a liberal arts plan when you can stay at home, forgo both real and opportunity costs, and slap a fancy-dancy adjective in front of your title? I just saved you $200,000. Next. Question.

Please feel free to use my suggested titles below and just PayPal me whatever you feel is appropriate:

  • Worldwide Dog Walker
  • Universal Park District Park Bench Repairman
  • Intercontinental Leather Suit Jacket Sewer and Hemmer
  • Thought Leader and Transformative Thinker on the Advancement of Aluminum Futon Frame Welding Technologies
  • International Fry Cook at Venus
  • Blockchain and Crypto Evangelist
  • Interplanetary Customer Care Specialist at Grubhub
  • Global Administrative Assistant to the Regional Vice President of Localized Grassroot Fundraising

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