But before we get to the song of the day, have any of you ever motorboated a girl so hard that you poked your eye on the nipple? Breasts are violence. Women are violence.
Another quick question: have you ever had those muggy summer days when you walk back from work, get home, and refuse to courtesy wipe because you’re afraid of knowing? Which leads to my final question: how much leaky butthole is too much leaky butthole?
I’m a moderate fan but big-league consumer of DUDE wipes. The single-package wipes are great for work, travel, and anywhere far from your home base. They’re great. However, my chief complaint is with regards to the extremely noisy aluminum wrapper. I often break these out while wiping at work and no doubt, guys in the stalls next to me think I’m unwrapping a Chipotle burrito in the can. Otherwise, these are excellent products. I promise this isn’t a product plug (pun intended).
Today’s song of the day is pretty damn solid, unlike my deposits following the post-work walk. I understand that I’ve used the base song as a song of the day in the past but this is the REEEEEEMIIIIIIIIIIX. It’s What Lovers Do (Slushii Remix/Audio) ft. SZA by Maroon 5. There are a few versions out there so make sure to listen to the YouTube video in the link. It’s also on Spotify. (ATTENTION Spotify senior management team: I’m open to a partnership with paid advertisements on my blog. My only caveat is that I’m unwilling to clean it up, figuratively and literally).