Random Bidtits (8/15/2016)

Ahhhhhh, salaam, and good evening to you, worthy friend.  Please, please, come closer.

To begin this evening, here is easily one of the greatest family guy bits of all time.  All part of the liberal left’s gay agenda/attack on the family/kitchen table.

Did you hear the one about the guy with five penises?  His pants fit like a glove.

Finally, here’s an iconic actor on the right who’s identical to a random tinder floozy (who tells me she’s educated and maybe even a bit ambitious, too):

For those of you who made it past by usually slurry of bullshit, here is a great commencement address from Jim Carrey given in 2014; or feel free to listen to just the highlights of the speech here.

Finally, new product idea for the next iPhone launch: include a finely tuned scale on the back of the phone as well as, fuck it, throw a Mercury thermometer on there for the next time we walk into the pool/hot tub without checking our fucking pockets.  Not bitter.  Definitely not bitter…

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