YO-HOOOOOOO!!!!!! Today's song of the day is Kung Fu Fighting by Carl Douglas. Well, I'm off to find a new dry cleaner after my current one fucked up my sheets for the second time in a row. It's true what they say: two wongs don't make a white. Add to that: my dry cleaner's 15... Continue Reading →
Song of the Day (1/8/2019)
What up, what up! Shout out to all my blupies who are enjoying the beginning of 2019. Still, 2018 was nothing to shake your dick at and just like Ryan (see below) would've wanted, we went out with a bang. Sorry if that was too soon - probably still simmering a little bit, huh? Well,... Continue Reading →
Arch Stanton Guest Post: Today I Learned – Quick Hits, Part Deux!
I keep a running list of things I think are 1. interesting, 2. warrant further investigation, and 3. would make a compelling article someone else may find entertaining or educational. Most have a meatiness to it, a sort of weightiness that can sustain a few hundred words on its own while many others are nothing... Continue Reading →
Arch Stanton Guest Post: Episode 27 in Today I Learned – Hassan-i Sabbah
Do you want to hear an extremely metal etymological story? I bet you do! You just read a series of words I am very comfortable have never been uttered before in the history of the world, and the subsequent story is suitable to its remarkable grandstanding. But first - a history lesson (what great story... Continue Reading →
Arch Stanton Guest Post: Problematic Christmas Songs
This being the year 2018 of our Lord Ronald Reagan, we all must be outraged, constantly, about everything. The best part is being unable to tell if this outrage is sincere or just part of the endless charade everyone has to partake in as part of their digital existence as we all waste our finite... Continue Reading →
Schlitz Bowling Ball
Ladies and gentlemen, you're currently ogling the greatest "Gift for Him" of all time. Maybe ever. This is a 16 pound undrilled ball, which can be yours for the low low price of $150. And for those of you who stuck around, here's an incredible account name and comment from pornhub:
I’m Oscar…
Dot com.
Random Bidtits (12/29/2018)
HO, HO, HOOO, Merry Christmas! Hope everyone had a pleasant holiday with family and friends. I'm writing to you from the cozy confines of a well-traveled watercloset while simultaneously bemoaning my holiday bloat - my lower intestine has determined that it will no longer formally recognize Solids as its own separate state (of matter). While... Continue Reading →
Song of the Day (12/19/2018)
Today is going to include a lot of random crap, much more so than is typical for this blog. We begin with a song - it's May I? Stand Unshaken by the Red Dead Redemption 2 soundtrack. I really recommend this one for easy listening - very relaxing and somewhat of a turning point in... Continue Reading →
Arch Stanton Guest Post: Episode 26 in Today I Learned – First Flying Car
I bet you're one of those people who whines about how "I was promised flying cars in the future, yet all I have are square watermelons and multiple types of bottled water," which would make you WRONG because the flying car has been invented already! You have a visual in your head of what a... Continue Reading →
Musings and Malarkey 
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