A Message to Garcia by Elbert Hubbard (1899) In all this Cuban business there is one man stands out on the horizon of my memory like Mars at perihelion. When war broke out between Spain and the United States, it was very necessary to communicate quickly with the leader of the Insurgents. Garcia was somewhere... Continue Reading →
Swamp Ass and Other Wrinkles (i.e., Problems)
Who among you shares my hesitation when it comes to drinking a soda with a label that is cousin to "swamp ass?" What’s worse, the logo for the swamp ass soda is a pair of nuts. I think it’s high time that the purveyors of swamp-ass, (praline) nut-cream soda pack it up and retool, per... Continue Reading →
Hurricane Harvey Grabs Headlines
...and some snatch. First Donny-T and then this...didn’t Bernie warn us about the billionaire class? Count it. With the media and celebrities viciously attacking Handsy Weinstein, I ask you this: who’s the real victim here? Of course I’m joking. But, is it really workplace sexual harassment if one participant is more senior than the other?... Continue Reading →
Isaac Newton was a DICK
But before I dive in head first (like Pete Rose), if you received the “Random Bidtits (10/4/2017)” email but didn’t read the post online, you’re missing out on a final paragraph following the photo of the porn stars (how many blogs can begin with this). Posted that mofo before it was finished. As for the... Continue Reading →
Random Bidtits (9/20/2017)
The below is a urologist...and an actual person: For those of you not getting it, that's Dr. Dick Tapper, Urologist. WTF is going on with all of these hurricanes in the Gulf?!? First there was Harvey. Then there was Irma, which was below initial expectations. Then there was Jose...following the media spectacle that was Harvey... Continue Reading →
Happy Ides of the Ides of March! And Happy Ides of September, brah!
Yo, home girl! What's good? Happy Friday! Random thought a good hombre shared with me this week: you can't spell "advertisements" without "semen" between the "tits." Now you know! Like that joke? Well, Reagan be with you. I don't know if it's because I've been taking creatine or because I've been pounding my clamhammer more... Continue Reading →
Random Bidtits (8/17/2017)
Not much here other than a collection of some solid (although not in the case of my poops) things I've come across in recent weeks. Unfortunately, I've been busy splitting my time between working (a novel concept) and splitting the porcelain (more of a navel concept). I spent this morning perched on the throne, feeling... Continue Reading →
The Trumps vs. The Bluths: A Posting by Arch Stanton
Good ol' boy Arch Stanton shared some words of wisdom with me a few weeks ago that are entirely worthy (okay, everything is worthy of this capitalist rag) of Musings and Malarkey. And without further delay, I give you Mr. Stanton. Arch on the Trumps vs. the Bluths: Let's look at the similarities between the... Continue Reading →
Song of the Day (6/30/2017)
Today's song of the day is Bitch Better Have my Money by Rihanna. Now for some entertaining/informative observations from the last few days: 1). Came across a urinal with an interesting print on the bottom. There's no way ("you're as bad at hockey as you are at golf" - Bob Barker) this design is intentional... Continue Reading →
Ellen Pao: Making a Difference, One Frivolous Lawsuit at a Time
When some people hear the terms Ellen Pao and Frivolous Lawsuit in the same breath, their minds go to Ellen's husband and better half, Alphonse "Buddy" Fletcher Jr. Nice man, nice man. Made a fortune in filing frivolous racial discrimination lawsuits (reference below:). So now that you have good-guy Buddy's background and you know that... Continue Reading →
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